In the spirit of working less and enjoying more, last week I took an afternoon off from my duties as Security Chief. Although I would have liked to go diving, getting the minions to design some gear for me is proving difficult. But as soon as I remembered I don’t need any equipment for snorkeling, I knew it was the right activity for me.
I’m a natural swimmer and my lungs hold just enough air for short dives in the shallow water. My slender snout is ideal for snooping around in the shallow water. My short legs and webbed paws work like fins, propelling my long body through the water. Matter of fact, I’m so naturally designed for snorkeling that I almost feel sorry for the humans who need masks and fins to participate.
Luckily, we keep a large selection of snorkeling equipment at the dive shop here at the resort, and a few of our adventurous guests were game to join me. We spotted plenty of colorful creatures. Not too far from shore, the stingrays and starfish were plentiful, as were conch, small squid, and even tiny sharks. Farther out, barracuda and bone fish, tarpon, jacks, permit, or even Hog-fish can sometimes be spotted. It’s not uncommon to also see a sea turtle or a dolphin or two frolicking nearby, although we saw no dolphins that day.
But nothing could have prepared me for the massive beast I saw cruising the water that afternoon. Yellow as the blazing sun, it was skimming along the top of the water and headed straight at us. I was nearly paralyzed in fear, and certain it would scoop me up in its powerful jaws. Ducking just in time, I caught only a glimpse of its ominous black tail fin as it darkened the water above my head.
Now to be honest, I’m not one who’s easily scared. I’ll normally face down just about any adversary. I’ve seen dolphins, sharks, and manatees up close before, but I knew right away this wasn’t any of those. This yellow fiend was a sea monster of the kind I’d never imagined, even in my worst nightmares, and I was terrified.
As quick as I could, I dog-paddled to the beach and shook the salt water out of my eyes, growling and barking in every direction. Once I was sure I had alerted the minions and everyone else nearby about the huge UFO (Unidentified Finned Object) in the water, I realized everyone was looking at me strangely. And laughing.
As my vision cleared, I looked back at the water where my amused friends were pointing. That’s when I realized that the yellow giant wasn’t a monster at all. It was simply some of our guests paddling about in a large yellow kayak. They had inadvertently skimmed right over me without realizing I was there.
In my defense, I must say that a simple, yellow kayak looks much different when you’re standing on shore than it does from underneath, distorted by the shimmering sun and seawater. Especially when your eyes are full of salty water. At least, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
Until next time, stay adventurous my friends!